There are days when I feel that the tears have dried
Nights when I wipe away phantom tears
A stoic heart evaporates what should be wetting my cheeks
A conscious mind soaked the moisture away from my skin
I sometimes beg for weeping
Then I'd feel my own heart beat
My own soul be
Sadly, in this moment
I feel that the tears have dried
Ironic, it's what others, and yes, me too, had hoped for
That one day, hours would pass without falling tears
That one day, I'd laugh and think again
It's here --- But, I'm not sure I like it that much more than
the tears
No words
I don't taste them anymore
When they're not seasoned with grief
I just hate this ambivalence
This life, after the death of my daughter
So real, so true. A beautiful poem.
ReplyDeleteAt first all we can do is cry and beg for a break in the tears. And now we wonder where all the tears have gone.
ReplyDeleteYou still love your daughter just as I still love my son. Our tears were once the only proof we had, but now I think we have other ways to prove our love and feel connected.
((((hugs)))
Oh wow, how beautifully written.
ReplyDelete"A stoic heart evaporates what should be wetting my cheeks"
I so get this.
It is such a shame that even once the acute phase of mourning has finished we still miss them just as much as before.
Beautifully expressed. My life seems somehow thinner now.
ReplyDeleteReminds me of a line from a song 'Now that the war is won, how come nothing tastes good?'
xo
Beautiful. And so sad. I dont think there is any stage that grief is easy, intense or not. Life is never the same after our babies die. (big hugs)
ReplyDeleteWow...so Beautiful in it's travesty.
ReplyDeleteI am not there yet, but by all accounts, I will be. Thank you for this poem.
(((HUGS)))
btw, you wrote this three days after I lost my son to SIDS.
ReplyDeleteI look at other grieved parents blogs, and read the blogs closest to Michael angel date. Not sure why...Just something I do.