Thursday, November 20, 2008

There is Little More to Do

That's how I feel,that there is little more to do. The date is past and now Caitlin has been dead for a year, and I'm here wishing that there was more to do. I've tried to write, but I am wordless. I've tried to think about calling those people who sincerely say, "if you ever need to talk, call me" but I am listless and mute. I've thought about listening to the "Caitlin & Mom" playlist on the iPod, but I am deaf. So, there is little more to do, but be here, I guess. Wait, perhaps there are images to come to me? No, it's all a foggy, blurry, nothingness.

1 comment:

  1. I wish there was something that I could say, but I know those words don't exist. I am so very sorry for all that you have lost. My daughter, Madeline, died in January 2007 and the pain is more than anyone should ever have to bare. I'm sorry that you also know what it feels like. '
    I read your entry, just don't get on the elevator, and I- well, I don't have words. I have felt that, that rush of desperation/insanity. The way you wrote of it is perfect and beautiful and so so sad.
    I saw your post on the creation station page at MISS and I wanted to tell you about a project that I started called Beauty In The Breakdown. It is a place to use creativity to release the emotions that flood you when your child dies. Your words are so honest and beautiful, I would love to include anything you would like to put on the site. Check it out and let me know, You can email me at Again, I am so deeply sorry.
    Stephanie (Madeline's Mommy)