Thursday, September 8, 2016

Narcissism & Grief

Let's see if I can make this story short . . .

I'm convinced one of my colleague's is a narcissist. This person is focused on self to a degree that has destroyed past and present friendships and work relationships. I probably shouldn't write about this. But I will.

I have a few things to "say" that I can't say to this person directly. Any attempt to reason or engage in adult conversation will likely "feed the tornado." I did my homework. The psychologist's advice for working for a narcissist is - - - leave. Recently, this person was unsuccessful in winning a bid for administrative control at my workplace. I was blamed for that outcome. Here's my "silent" responses:

  1. I voted my conscience. 
  2. I made the voices of those without power heard.
  3. No threats or promises to destroy my credibility, reputation, or affection of others will deter me from continuing in a manner that honors who I believe I am and who I aspire to be.
  4. You may be successful in "dimming" my light from others, but that's not happening with my permission or without my push-back. 
  5. Success in actually destroying my credibility, reputation, or affection of others may hurt me, but my life experiences assure me that nothing will ever destroy me after surviving and learning to thrive in this life after the death of my child excepting my own death. In which case that stuff won't matter anymore.
  6. I am the boss of my emotions and you have no power over me.
  7. I continue to be grateful for the kindnesses you showed to me in the past. Although, I suspect they may have had selfish motivations, my gratitude for the deeds stand.
  8. I will be kind, but I won't be manipulated or a become a complacent receptacle for your anger.
  9. I wish you didn't believe that hurting others would make your grief lessen. 
  10. I wish you peace and release from the sorrows you bear. 

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